Wednesday, February 22, 2012


I'm having one of those days where I just feel...stuck. Yesterday was great, despite the fact that I was running around like a maniac between doctor appointments, dropoffs and pickups, and trying to squeeze in some work at Starbucks. My brain was overflowing with things to write, and I was inspired by my music and the view from the dashboard of my car.

Today, nothin'.

I got up, made my breakfast and got dressed in "real" clothes. I kept the fire going. I did my routine with Colden and got him out the door to preschool on time. I sat down and checked in with my email and my to-do list. Then I pulled up the blogs that I started last night.


So, I did some beading. Took some photographs for a tutorial and a blog and edited all of them. Still stuck. I made a strung necklace with the lovely beads I got from this month's Beadin' Path Beads In the Mail club. I had some lunch and a couple of cookies.

Still nothin'.

Part of what's bothering me is this damn herringbone bezel that I've been trying to stitch. It was a brilliant idea, and I know I had seen it before. I found the directions and tried modifying mine so that it used some of the techniques from the other version. And no matter what I did, short of using glue or double-stick tape (which I really don't want to do) the damn thing just pops right out.

My crazy messy beading work tray right now. There are at least three different projects there. The scattered beads and projects perfectly reflect my state of mind right about now. Drat.

And then there's the part of me that's been feeling so good lately. The part that thinks, "No, this can't be happening. Isn't there something wrong with you? No, there must be something wrong with you. There was always something wrong with your mother, so there must be something wrong with you."

Lately, I've felt as though I'm on the verge of something...big. But I just don't know what. Yesterday, it seemed as though every license plate I saw had a message for me - literally. They all spelled things out, like "LKPLCDSK8". Some of them I just couldn't understand...and it made me think that maybe the Universe has something else big waiting for me.

Or, I could just be thinking too much again and need a walk in the backyard or the woods to clear my head a bit. At the very least, I could go empty and reload the dishwasher...

I'm stuck. I don't know why.

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